Therapy

The world is my therapist!

The last two Januarys/Februarys

have been very difficult.

I have said painful goodbyes

to the two men I have loved as husbands.

Many people think a therapist teaches a person

how to get through their troubles.

And most therapists do assign "homework".

But they give very little advice.

They listen as their patient processes.

You, my dear readers, have been my therapist!

And over the next six weeks,

You will continue to be so!

Seeing it coming does not lessen the pain.

In fact, in many ways, it increases it.

January and early February

are ripe with hard days.

As I have shared,

I remember dates. 

When I was 13,

I got my first "grown up" kiss.

He was 14,

and while I'm pretty sure I wasn't his first,

I now know he wasn't very good.

I've kissed some experts since then! ;-)

Nonetheless, I was very excited.

That same boy,

about a month later,

raped me as another boy watched.

All these years later,

every year on April 26,

I remember that boy's birthday.

Drives me crazy.

Today is Harlan's birthday.

I imagine I will always remember it.

And today,

it hurts.

But as I was having my time with the Lord this morning,

I was reading in the Book of John.

And what a wonderful thing I read!

My prayer is not for the world,

but for those you have given Me,

because they belong to You.

And all of them,

since they are Mine,

belong to You;...

Holy Father,

keep them and care for them...

so they [will] be filled with my joy...

keep them safe from the evil one...

Make them pure and holy

by teaching them Your words of truth...

I am praying not only for these disciples

but also for all who will ever believe in me

because of their [the disciple's] testimony.

My prayer for all of them is that they will be one,

just as You and I are one, Father -

- that just as You are in Me and I am in You,

so they will be in Us...

You love them as much as You love Me.

                                            ~~ John 17: 9-24 NLT ~~

Isn't that amazing???

All those years ago,

Jesus prayed for me and for you!!!

He loved us then -

- He loves us now!

And the Father,

He loves us just as much as He loves Jesus!!!

So, as I walk through this valley of loss

over the next few weeks,

Jesus is loving on me!

God is loving on me!

As you walk through your valleys,

Jesus is loving on you!

God is loving on you!

We are being lifted

to the very Throne Room of Heaven

by the Prince Himself!

Can't get much more support than that!

And how my heart sings at that truth!

Carry me through these days,

Daddy God!

In the shadows of heartache and loss,

remind me that the "Son" still shines!

I don't understand!

I don't like it!

I wish with all my heart it was different!

I pray with all my heart that I am wrong,

that we will be restored.

But I accept Your will!

I trust You!

Today, I choose joy!