Choosing Joy

I am in a widow's group on Facebook.
We have very interesting discussions.
Today the following question was asked:

"I have a question for you all. 

I was talking to a friend today about how impatient 

I was/am to "get over this" and figure out the rest of my life. 

Their response was 

"Oh, you'll never get over it, you'll just learn to live through it". 

I cannot tell you the panic and fear 

that ran through my heart to hear those words.

Their father died 19 years ago and they've been 

watching their mother deal with her grief since that time. 

So, my question is.......what are your thoughts on this? 

Do we get over it or do we just learn to live through and WITH it??"

I so understand my friend's response!

Because I absolutely do not want to live in grief!

And I don't believe God intends for me -

or anyone else -

to do so indefinitely!

And, as I have shared before,

I am striving to choose joy each day!

But today, I needed this discussion!

Amazing how God does that!

Here are my thoughts.

I think we probably don't get over it, 

we probably do learn to live with it. 

But I believe that if we allow it, 

God restores joy! 

Sometimes the allowing comes easy, 

sometimes it takes gritting our teeth and saying,

"I WILL allow God to use this for my good and His glory! 

I WILL choose joy!" 

I'm in a teeth gritting stage right now. 

And to be honest, I don't FEEL very joyful. 

But in the midst of the teeth gritting,

in the midst of the intense sorrow,

in the midst of the losses,

there is assurance of His presence 

and His peace is carrying me through the storm. 

All storms pass. 

And return. 

They come and go. 

Happiness is fleeting. 
And so is intense grief.

But God, God is constant! 

His peace is always there for the taking! 

It's not a feeling, it's something deep inside that defies explanation. 

I just know it's there. 

And it brings joy in the midst of the sorrow.

The Lord is my strength and my shield;

my heart trusts in Him,

and He helps me.

My heart leaps for joy,

and with my song I praise Him.

                                                                 ~~ Psalm28:7 NIV ~~