Today...

It seems like yesterday.

It seems like forever ago.

Sometimes it seems like it was not really my life,

but someone else's that I read about.

But it was real.

And it was ten years ago today.

A whole decade since we heard those words,

"Mr. Garrett, you do have cancer."

He was so matter-of-fact, emotionless.

He was simply doing his job as the ER physician on duty.

He explained what would happen in the next few hours,

then went on to his next patient.

I feel rather certain he never thought of us again,

at least not more than in passing.

But our lives, my life, was profoundly changed in that instant.

I look back over the last decade

and think of how different it has been 

than it would have been without those words.

An instant.

Just an instant.

Six little words delivered in a second or less.

That instant ten years ago still affects my today,

my children's today,

the today of people who

did not even know me in that instant,

never knew him.

We live in hope,

hope in Christ,

a "promise" hope

not a "wish" hope,

but an assurance of His future, prepared for us.

On that day ten years ago,

we didn't know the extent of his cancer

and for a few days,

we lived in that wish kind of hope. 

We quickly moved into the Promise Hope;

today, I still live there.

 

I have been privileged to see a glimpse of that Promise in this past decade.

I have seen a glimpse of it in watching dear, precious loved ones

cross that divide.

I have seen a glimpse of it in His restoration of my desire to live.

He is real!

Heaven is real!

Redemption is real!

Life does go on!

There is healing over there,

and there is healing here!

 

But while we are yet here,

in our humaness,

we grieve our earthly loss.

Ten years ago today, I felt it.

Eight months, three days later, I felt it.

Today, ten years later, I feel it.

 

Today, I think of a decade from now.

What will the upcoming decade hold?

How many more times will the sorrow of grief touch me? 

How many more joys will I experience?

How many more glimpses of the Promise of Hope will I see?

 

Today, as my heart remembers,

today as the pain of that moment is felt deep within my soul,

today as I think of the amazing man

who moved to his final home eight months, three days later,

today as I think of the life I live now

and wonder about the life I might have lived if...

...today, I think of the pain in Uvalde, Texas.

I think of the husbands,

the sons and daughters,

the mommies and daddies,

the brothers and sisters,

the grandparents, cousins, friends,...

my heart breaks for them

and for us as a nation.

 

Today, for all those mourn,

there is overwhelming grief.

Crushing anguish.

Anger.

It is fresh, acute.

Today, they look to a future that is empty of someone precious.

There will not be one "anniversary",

there will be thousands.

The rest of their lives will be filled with events where there is an empty chair.

Moving forward will be slow and painful.

Taking the next breath will be painful...

 

For our nation, we will move forward much more quickly,

we already have begun to move from shocked outrage 

into political opportunity.

But we will remember.

Every year our Facebook memories

will bring up the "Pray for Uvalde" profile picture change

and our heads will shake at the senseless violence,

the putrid loss of life,

our hearts will squeeze as we remember the shock and outrage,

we will lift those left behind once again in prayer.

 

Let us all, as I do on this tenth anniversary of "D-day",

let us all remember,

our Hope is not in legislation,

it is not in a utopian society,

it is not in filling an empty chair on a dark day of remembrance -

for it cannot be filled this side of eternity -

let us remember,

our Hope is in Jesus Christ.

And it is a sure Hope,

a Promise!

Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. 

 But take heart, because I have overcome the world.

                                        ~~ John 16:33 ~~

He will wipe every tear from their eyes, 

and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. 

All these things are gone forever.

                                                ~~ Revelation 21:4 NLT~~