Thursday, October 5, 2017

My name is Gina, and I am a perfectionist......

Yes.
It is true.
I am a perfectionist.

There are a lot of misconceptions
about perfectionists
the main one being
that they do everything well.
That is not true.
In fact,
most perfectionists spend so much time
on minute details
that they don't complete tasks
or if they do,
they complete late,
exhausted,
and feeling as if they've failed miserably.

You see,
a perfectionist is not perfect!
No, they simply expect perfection of themselves -
and, unfortunately, sometimes others.
When they do not achieve perfection -
which, of course, they cannot -
they cannot let it go,
berate themselves,
and are very likely not to attempt again
the failed project.

It has taken me a lot of years,
a great deal of effort,
and no small amount of prayer
to begin to give myself a break.
But now and again......

About a year ago,
I undertook a project.
Something I expected I would love!
But I can't seem to get it right!
For nearly a year,
I have tried and failed.
Over
and over
and over again.
It leaves me feeling incompetent.
Stupid.
Frustrated.
But I am determined not to quit
out of fear of not ever getting it right!!!
It -
and I -
have potential!!!
And I'm getting closer to getting it right
with every single attempt!
I'm learning much about the project,
my mentor in the project,
and myself! 
Quitting is not an option!!!

I have realized that following Christ
is very similar!
We want to do it right.
Perfectly.
And when we fail -
and we will fail -
we are tempted to give up,
quit.
But God is an infinitely patient and gentle mentor!
And as we struggle to get it right,
we learn more about being a believer, a follower,
more about our Father, Saviour, and Comforter,
and more about ourselves.

My project will never be perfect.
But it will get better and better each time.
And we will never reach Christian perfection
this side of Heaven.
But we will grow and thrive,
and become closer and closer to our Creator, Saviour, Friend. 

I read something recently.

Tonight, I am resting from my project.
And when my soul becomes weary of 
the struggle for Christian perfection,
I rest in my Comforter.
I do not quit!

Are you weary of the struggle to get it right?
Rest.
Don't quit!
 


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